Love starts with attraction, then it builds into fantasy, giving way for a friendship that may or may not lead to more. If there was a way to control who you fall in love with, would you? Well I think we have some sort of control over who we allow in our lives, and in turn have some sort of control over who we fall in love with. Let me start with two scenarios.
Girl A Meets Boy B
Girl A tells herself she can never date Boy B
Girl A starts to avoid Boy B and never changes her mind
Girl A starts to date Boy A
They fall in love and that ends any chances with Boy B
Girl A Meets Boy B
Girl A leaves room to get to know Boy B
Girl A creates this fantasy around Boy B
Girl A Falls in love with Boy B
Right or Wrong Girl A feels Boy B is for her
The difference in the two scenarios is opportunity. If girl A did not leave room or create an opportunity for herself to fall for Boy B. It probably would have never happened. It is for this reason I beleive we can sometimes choose who we fall in love with.
How to Avoid Falling in Love with The Wrong Person
It is very possible to fall in love with the wrong person. Love is a mental thing as much as it is an emotional thing. I believe love starts with the images we create in our head (mental) and allowing our heart process these things into what we want (emotional). You can meet someone today and tell yourself that you have no interest in them and nothing will come out of it. At the same time, you can decide you want to be interested in that person, only to find yourself falling in love later down the line. Who we choose to deal with is totally up to us.
A lot of times, it takes conditioning to avoid falling for someone we are attracted to, most especially when we know they are all types of wrong for us. If you meet a man or woman and you are very much attracted to them, but they have certain characteristics you know you cannot deal with, why put yourself through the trouble of trying to change them simply because you find them attractive?
Lack of attraction can also make us miss out on who is good for us. You can meet a man or woman today and they are very right for you, yet you feel nothing towards them. Attraction plays a big role in the early stages of who we allow ourselves open up to. The mind should help in preventing you from falling in love with the wrong attractive person.
How do you prevent yourself from giving your love to the wrong person you ask? Consistent Reinforcement!. If you consistently tell yourself that you do not need this person and continue to avoid contact, eventually it may fizzle away. If you hold on to your fantasies about that person, you will never completely let go.
Holding on to images you have created in your head, knowing that person is not good for you, may end up doing more harm than good. So, if you wish to let go of someone you love because it can never be, consistently tell yourself why it cannot be. Do not make excuses for said person and more importantly do no wait in vain. There are loads of fishes in the sea waiting to get caught.